My Heart...

Since I was a little girl I have always been a talker. I have always talked to just about anyone I came in passing with and for this reason I tend to form new relationships easily. The bad part about it is I have a huge heart. I give my relationships so much thought and energy that at the end of the day I sometimes feel a little drained because I love everyone in my life so much. BUT I would not change it for the world. I used to dislike very much that God gave me such a caring, concerned, loving heart. I used to pray that God would make me tough and hard so I could stand my ground more and be more mean. (I know that is a funny prayer to pray to God, but I did it; I am sure he gets quite the laugh out of prayers sometimes.) Overtime, or really in the past two years I realized that my heart is what makes me unique.

There are two things in life that I feel God gave me as my gifts to use to draw people closer to him as well as me closer to him 1) loving people and 2) running. I have always had an extremely hard time putting myself first. Typically, I will do whatever I can for others and then put myself last. BUT what god has shown me these past few years is that I can still do GOOD work for him by loving people but the one gift he gave to me for me that I can be selfish with is RUNNING. When I am running I am at such a peace. Whether I be running with a friend or just by myself I find myself just breathing in the fresh air and taking in all the serenity around me. It truly has been the place I worship God best. And I praise him for giving me the ability to run!

I realized today that I am still a constant work in progress when this sweet old man in a red truck was stopped on the side of the road. I went against everything my husband has ever told me about stopping to help people and I stopped. He was trying to get these huge metal round things to tie back to his truck. (I think they were underground piping but I am not sure) So I stepped out of my small Corolla and headed to his truck. He had to be 80 years old and he looked at me like "what are you going to do...you can't lift these." Long story short I was able to help him get them tied to the truck and the sweet old man was on his way. Well, as I headed home I got consumed with the thought that I just stopped my car to help someone and I never once mentioned Jesus. What was I thinking!?

Then God reminded me that sometimes HE can do the work through me without even me saying a word about HIM. So I can just relax and use the gifts he gave me. So for now I will just keep on LOVING PEOPLE & JESUS and RUNNING. And I will trust he will use me for his GREAT WILL.

Now for your question...What are the gifts God has given you? and Do you use them to bring him glory?

Tenth Avenue North - You Are More

Love this song. And love his preaching. Enjoy:)

M.I.A

Wow! I have really been MIA. I am sorry. My weeks for the next seven weeks are crazy busy. I don't even really have time to sit. In the mean time my sweet husband has been pulling Mr. HGTV in our kitchen. I would love to say WE have been working on it but that would be a lie. He has done it ALL.

Of course through remodeling our kitchen I felt God telling me something. I looked at our kitchen before and then look at it almost finished & I get this image of a broken life in my head and the way God renews our spirits. He is able to take a life and reconstruct it totally if you allow him in. It is not an overnight project for sure but overtime he renews your spirit and makes you whole again. We are on week 2 of remodeling our kitchen and it is still not done. The remodeling of anything takes time and that is why we have to be patient. God is working on us and in us daily. It is not an overnight process. It is a life process. Daily he does new things, puts new things on your heart, but it is up to you to act. You have to be willing to let him work in you and he will do great things.

Listen to the song I posted above this post. You are More by Tenth Avenue North. He gives a great message and then sings an awesome song.

Detour

Scott and I had a great opportunity to get away from home for a while this past week. We headed to Florida on Monday and stayed until Thursday. It was such a relaxing, fun trip! On our way back yesterday our drive went from 10 hours to 13 hours in duration when we hit a complete stop on 75. We luckily were near an exit and we pulled off real quick to stop at a truck stop. As we walked into the truck stop Scott turned quickly into the typical man and hid behind the candy aisle while I asked for quick detour directions. We then got back on the road and were well on our way. After 4 turns, 2 different highways, a run down town, and an hour later we ended up about a mile in front of the bad accident that had traffic stopped for a good 18 miles. We felt so successful and kind of laughed about all the people behind us that were not as smart as us for getting on the detour. I then started brewing thoughts in my mind about something to write about. My first thought was how do I write about a detour and god's path? Normally when we think of people taking a detour off of god's path we think about huge mistakes and regrets. But sometimes God can send the detours our way to make us grow.

As humans, we normally want the shortest, quickest, easiest path to point A to point B. We get so frustrated if something or someone gets in our way. So when a roadblock gets in our way and delays us from where we are trying to go we turn from godly people to not so godly people.

In life we often make plans. We have a certain timeline of how we think our life should go and get frustrated when things do not go as planned. For example, we expect to be at a certain position in our jobs by a certain time, make a certain amount of money, live in a big house, have X amount of kids, and have a certain amount of money in our retirement fund. As many of you know life just does not always goes as planned and many times you encounter a detour that may take you in a different direction that may delay your orignial destination.

Because our God loves us he sends detours our way. He usually does this because he is maturing our hearts and drawing us closer to him. We might not always know the plan or reason for God's detour but one thing is for sure it is never meant to bring us down. God is only trying to make you stronger.

Finally, we arrived home and ahh it was such a relief! I was feeling on fire for God because the last 7 hours of our trip I meditated on what God was trying to tell me through the detour! I got home read my bible and then did some research on my computer about getting pregnant and miscarriages.I swear Satan gets into my head sometimes and tells me everything I read on google is true.(which is one of his silly lies) After reading and feeling really down for about an hour I sat my computer down on the floor. Instantly, and I mean within a millisecond my computer started sparking and smoking. It blew up:) What a sign from God it was! He was saying well if you aren't going to listen to your doctor I will just take care of it for you. Long story short, my computer is fried and it can not be resuscitated. A dear friend of ours recovered all of my documents luckily! I just had to laugh about it because only God could blow up my computer like that.

Then, again today God challenged me again. It is exactly 5 weeks since my miscarriage and today I got my first (thing that we women hate that we get once a month, sorry boys!) since the miscarriage. Ugh what a reality check it was for me to remind me I am NOT pregnant. I knew it was coming but there was a little piece of me that thought just maybe I could be pregnant. I wanted so bad to be mad at God but as I turned on the TV I saw a tsunami was about to hit Japan & my small problem turned into something so minute compared to the 1,000 that lost their lives.

Even though I am NOT pregnant, my computer is fried, and it took us 13 hours to get home yesterday God has revealed so much to my heart. He continues to tell me TRUST HIM, TRUST HIM, TRUST HIM. There is no detour he is going to take me down that won't lead directly in someway back to his path. He WILL bless me with the desires of my heart. I just have to be patient.

This Little Light of Mine - Addison Road

What a beautiful song..an old child song we used to sing brings so much joy to my heart. It says when times get hard don't forget whose child you are.

Heaven is for Real

About a week ago one of our pastors called Scott to recommend a book to us called "Heaven if for Real." Of course, me being a student the only book I have time to read is my Bible and of course my Pharmacotherapy book. Scott on the other hand jumped right on the opportunity and downloaded it on his nook. We were desperate for anything to help us. The book is fairly short 158 pages and Scott read it all in two nights; he couldn't put it down. He would run into the bedroom at times and wake me from my sleep to tell me little tidbits from the book. He was in awe and so excited. Well, last night was the start of my spring break and I finally got to sit down to read the book. Long story short I finished it in one sitting. This is a must read.

It is about a little 4 year old boy who became very sick on a family vacation. He had appendicitis which went missed for 8 days. His parents took him to a hospital where they kept him overnight for a few nights but the doctors could not figure out what was wrong with him. Finally his dad got so frustrated that he snatched his little boy up and took him to a different hospital. At that hospital the little boy named Colton was diagnosed with appendicitis and taken to emergency surgery. I don't want to give the whole story away. Soon after the surgery Colton told his dad that he got to see angels at the hospital. His dad(a pastor) did not understand this because no where on Colton's hospital reports did it say he died. Colton began giving an unbelievable account of heaven and the things he saw in heaven. One in particular was he got to meet his little sister.

As Colton described in a conversation with his mom, "Mom, you had a baby die in your tummy, didn't you?" His mom Sonja replied, "Who told you I had a baby die in my tummy?" Colton replied with no hesitation, "She did, Mommy. She said she died in your tummy." Unbelieveable! Colton's parents had never told him they had a miscarriage nor did they know their miscarried child was a little girl. They were in awe.

The part that made me feel peace was when Sonja started to cry after hearing Colton's truth. Colton said, "It's okay Mommy. She's okay. God adopted her." To know that our little baby has been adopted by God gives me an unbelieveable peace.

This is such a remarkable, refreshing book and I encourage you to read it. A 4 year old boy doesn't just make these things up. He uttered so much truth and described heaven in great detail. I have a great faith but I will admit wholeheartedly that this miscarriage has caused me to doubt God's ability at my weak times. After finishing the book I can say I am super excited to meet our baby again one day and I am assured that our baby is safe and breathing in all the beauties heaven offers. The book is hardly just about a miscarriage though. Maybe just a chapter. So I hope you will read it. I promise it will change your life.

God works in our lives everyday. He amazes me. Just the same day that our pastor called Scott to recommend the book, I was meeting a friend at the park to embark on an adventurous trail run.(something I don't tend to like because I am afraid of bears and coyotes) As I was pulling into the park our pastor was driving by me in the opposite direction. We both rolled our windows down and dangerously talked in the middle of the road. I knew then God was telling me I had to read this book. And for the trail run that day...it was amazing! With God's help I can do anything...and now I love trail runs!(bears, coyotes, and all)

Have a blessed day!